The Noise Factor

Reading several other bloggers talk about Tony Gwynn and Cal Ripken brought back memories of these two great baseball players who will be enshrined into Cooperstown tomorrow. When I was younger I would watch the inductees of great baseball players who I could only read about or watch at the tail end of their careers. Nowadays I can see ballplayers get in that I can at least say I saw in their prime.

No more evident is the 1991 All-Star festivities when my brother and I got to watch the Home Run Derby at Toronto’s Skydome. Cal Ripken went off in the competition and belted 12 bombs to win convincingly. He was in the midst of one of his finest seasons of his great career that year. He went on to hit 34 bombs and win both the All-Star Game MVP and season MVP honours.

Staying with Ripken here, I remember going to a game in 1993 and the Blue Jays had recently re-acquired Tony Fernandez to replace Dick Schofield. All game my old man was talking about how Cal Ripsh!t couldn’t hold a candle to Tony at defense. Now, I agree that Fernandez was better defensively but I didn’t think Cal was that bad. Well, he had a tough game that night and the Jays came back and won. I’m almost 100% sure that it was the same night Reggie Lewis of the Boston Celtics died. I may be mixing two nights up but I believe it occurred on the same night. What I do remember of that night was my dad finding a questionable alleyway to park the car for free. He got away with it, surprisingly.

He broke the consecutive game streak of Lou Gehrig on my birthday. He also ended his game streak in Toronto, which I was shocked that he decided to end the streak near the end of that particular season.

His great play, determination and hard work made him a popular player during his time. So popular that regardless of how good or bad his season was going he would find his way into the All-Star game. Near the end of his career there were a few All-Star games he should not have been to, but that is something out of Cal’s control. Yet the year he was having a forgettable season he wins the All-Star game MVP (2001). Funny how things work out sometimes.

He made his move to third base gracefully and it helped his team become better as they nearly got to the World Series in 1997. But I will always remember him as a shortstop.

…

It would have been great to watch Tony Gwynn play live and in person but I got to watch a lot of film on him. My dad would tell me to watch Gwynn swing the bat carefully and see how he handled the bat on every pitch and every swing. He is the one that sent me to San Diego in late-1997 to attend the San Diego School of Baseball to meet Tony Gwynn.

I was in his last group as he was about to go watch Tony Jr. play in a basketball tournament later that afternoon. He got us to hit whiffle balls off a tee and the catch was we had to hit the whiffle back toward the pitcher. At first Tony was all over me as I wanted to pull the thing out of the park. Earlier in the day Dave Engle, former Minnesota Twin, was all over me for the same thing. So I worked my tail off to show Mr. Gwynn that I could do it. So he would walk by each set-up asking us to hit him with the whiffle ball. He would stand about 20-30 feet in front of us and we weren’t too successful. On my last swing, however, I got him in the thigh. Then he stepped up to a tee himself and proceeded to stripe the whiffle ball up the middle effortlessly. Incredible hitter. His autograph remains on my shelf to this day.

That baseball experience was great as I also met Alan Trammell, Bob Cluck, Matt Clement and a host of other ex-ballplayers and coaches.

Just thinking back on the experience with Gwynn, my group played a Japanese All-Star team a couple days later in a game where we had a pitching machine - throwing nothing but sinister curve balls. At 15 I never saw a curve that good. But thanks to Tony’s session earlier in the camp, I was able to wait a split-second longer on that curve rather than try to pull it. Even my brother conceded that the machine was throwing some excellent deuces that day.

Speaking of my brother, he decided to make a tape full of top hitters during the playoffs in 1996. Tony Gwynn made a lot of his highlights to go along with an epic Rickey Henderson home run moment that overshadowed all the hitters. Gwynn had the most recorded highlights on that tape. It even featured Jeff Kent in a Cleveland Indians uniform! Yes, he played for Cleveland.

I watched Tony’s 3000th hits in both english and french. I saw the highlight on a french channel since the game took place in Montreal. He can say he got the hit against a team that now does not exist. But the two things that stick out the most about him were 1) He wasn’t so physically gifted when I met him so I was a bit surprised of how good he was and 2) He was the one guy Ted Williams thought could make a serious run at .400.

Taking my dad’s advice, he was one of the first non-Blue Jay players I sought to watch every time I had the opportunity.

Two great players who seemed like decent guys will be officially enshrined tomorrow. Can’t ask for anything better out of this year’s class.

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Took in a competitive match-up between two top teams in Major League Baseball as the Los Angeles Angels took on the Detroit Tigers this afternoon (it’s actually still going in the background here).  As I watched the game I started to marvel in the team I called "fraudulent" last season, Detroit.  People predicted they would beat out established contenders like the defending champion Chicago White Sox, perennial contenders the Minnesota Twins and the up-and-coming Cleveland Indians.  I thought these people were nuts!  But what occurred last year was a hot April by Chris Shelton, unknown relievers stepping up, some kid named Justin Verlander and a few young players stepping up like Curtis Granderson, Marcus Thames, Craig Monroe and Brandon Inge.  Sometimes a team needs to come together and get hot at the same time to get it done.  They faded in September but got hot again in early October and at this point in 2007 they are the favourites to win the World Series.  After they dismantled the Boston Red Sox a couple weeks back they are the team to beat. 

So who’s the most dangerous player (non-pitcher) on that team?  Who provides the biggest impact on their team?  How about the rest of the league?  Let’s take a look, division by division…

AL East

Baltimore Orioles - Miguel Tejada

- He’s still the guy in Baltimore who will pound the ball, play adequate defense and scare opponents.  There are no other player in that lineup that will do that.

Boston Red Sox - Manny Ramirez

- Why Manny and not Ortiz?  Manny plays the field and Ortiz has not been Ortiz with this knee injury he must have inherited from his long-lost brother Mo Vaughan.   Manny is one of the best hitters of our time and he will either scare other teams with his green monster play or scare his own team and the fans with his questionable play.

New York Yankees - Alex Rodriguez

- Although some points could be given to Derek Jeter, we cannot ignore this amazing season A-Rod is having.

Tampa Bay Devil Rays - Carl Crawford

- Give an honourable mention to B.J. Upton who’s having a fantastic season, Crawford scares you with his all-around talent.  He is Tim Raines Jr.

Toronto Blue Jays - Alex Rios

- No doubt that Rios is the man in Toronto.  He is the best hitter and he is also the best defensive outfielder on the team despite having his gold gloves ripped away from him by teammate Vernon Wells.

AL Central

Chicago White Sox - Paul Konerko

- A year ago I would have said Jermaine Dye but there is nothing dangerous with a .220-.240 hitter.  Chicago has had a season where guys are having off-years all over the place.  They are this years’ Cleveland Indians.  Konerko gets the nod by default.

Cleveland Indians - Grady Sizemore

- 5-Tool player who has yet to play up to his hype.  That should change as maybe someday he will be a perennial .300 hitter.  Despite that, he’s still dangerous in all facets of the game.

Detroit Tigers - Magglio Ordonez

- Wanted to go with Carlos Guillen who can play 4 positions and hit the baseball, but like A-Rod you cannot ignore the MVP-type season Maggs is producing.  He crushed some rocks this afternoon on his bomb to Center.   Not to be outdone, Guillen was stealing bases like it was house league .

Kansas City Royals - Alex Gordon

- How can a guy hitting .245 make the cut?  It’s called A) Kansas City and B) hitting below .200 for the first couple months of the year.  This kid is getting better and better and his upside is scary.

Minnesota Twins - Joe Mauer

- Torii Hunter should get the nod based on this season alone but I find it interesting that he’s doing this in his walk year.  Mauer is solid behind the plate and is a hitting machine.  The team has not played well without him as of late which means his presence is being felt.

AL West

Los Angeles - Vladimir Guerrero

- Do I even need a second opinion?  The guy hits over .320, over 30 bombs and over 100 RBI’s every year and manages to keep his K’s minimal despite his free-swinging ways.

Oakland Athletics - Mark Ellis

- Could have gone with Shannon Stewart or Mike Piazza but the holes are glaring.  Ellis is an everyday player who quietly puts up solid numbers at second base for the A’s.

Seattle Mariners - Ichiro Suzuki

- If he wanted to hit home runs, he would.  But he plays a specific kind of game that suits him very well.  A .340 hitter with speed to burn and a great arm makes him very dangerous.

Texas Rangers - Michael Young

- Love Teixeira but Young is the man in Texas.  He does everything well and plays hard.  Also has shown to be clutch.  Prior to this year, the best shortstop in the majors in my mind.

NL East

Atlanta Braves - Brian McCann

- Andruw is hitting .215 and Chipper’s playing percentage is about as solid as his fielding percentage.  McCann may not be having a great year but he’s more dangerous in my mind than Jeff Francouer.  McCann is the kind of Catcher you can hang your hat on for years, just like what Joe Mauer is to Minnesota.

Florida Marlins - Miguel Cabrera

- Credit to Hanley Ramirez, but you have to go with the second coming of Albert Pujols.  Cabrera can hit with the best of them and he’s been known to play different positions as well.  He’s one of the best hitters in baseball.

New York Mets - Jose Reyes

- Beltran is great, so is Wright, but Reyes scares you everywhere.  In the field, on base or at the plate this guy can do everything.  Reyes has even shown signs of power as well.  Huge weapon.

Philadelphia Philles - Chase Utley

- This is the one I will get flack for.  Ryan Howard is a beast, but Utley can do everything.  Can I reiterate how much I love Howard?

Washington Nationals - Ryan Zimmermam

- You now see a trend; youth matters.  Zimm is the only guy with double-digit homers on the team and he is only getting better.

NL Central

Chicago Cubs - Alfonso Soriano

- He’s the guy who can hit, run and throw and at times he can even catch the baseball.  He is a bigger threat because of all that than Derrek Lee and Aramis Ramirez. 

Cincinnati Reds - Brandon Phillips

- Move over Mr. Griffey, Phillips has taken over as the man in Cincy.  Granted, Kenny’s going to the Hall of Fame but Phillips is the guy the Reds need to lock up for many years to come.

Houston Astros - Carlos Lee

- Hunter Pence is a nice player who may be great very soon, but Lee is holding it down right now.  He is doing what he was asked to do by management - he has not been the problem with Houston’s season.

Milwaukee Brewers - Prince Fielder

- Ryan Braun nearly ripped it away from Prince.  Prince is what Magglio is to Detroit right now and needs to be on here.

Pittsburgh Pirates - Jason Bay

- He may not have the average (.252) but he is the most complete player on that team.  He actually walks too, something the rest of the team has trouble doing. 

St. Louis Cardinals - Albert Pujols

- Can you name another player on that team worthy of replacing Pujols?

NL West

Arizona Diamondbacks - Eric Byrnes

- He is Mr. Everything to Arizona.  He hits, he steals, he plays hard, he leads.  Enough said.

Colorado Rockies - Matt Holliday

- Had some of the other hot-shots performed like Holliday with the bat this year, Colorado would be contending this year.  Holliday has ripped the baseball constantly this year.

Los Angeles Dodgers - Russell Martin

- You’d expect this spot to be occupied by a big money free agent but that is not the case.  Nobody performs better at their position than Martin does behind the plate for the Dodgers.

San Diego Padres - Adrian Gonzalez

- The big park doesn’t faze this kid as he continues to thrive at the major league level.  With the increase in power, stadiums should be more like Petco Park to truly test the great power of these players.

San Francisco Giants - Barry Bonds

- They need him in the lineup everyday because he is either a power threat or he manages to take walks and show his patience.  At 43, pitchers still don’t want any part of him.  That means he’s dangerous.

Took a little bit of time but this was fun.  Let the debates rage for this one….
 

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Weak in quantity, strong in quality.  Please let me introduce you to a Fox Blog Hall of Famer, ShooterB:

Do Canadians have any cyclists in the Tour de France?  And if so, do Canadian bicycles come equipped with McNugget warmers, in case your marbles are frozen to the seat?

- No, tights and McNugget warmers don’t mix.  We have to drop a maxi-pad down there.  Then again, that’s what I’ve been told since I haven’t rose a bike since the 1990’s.
 
What Canadian football team do you think Michael Vick is going to play for when he gets out of jail?

- Hamilton Ti-Cats.  That’s an animal he would get killed over if he lets it loose.  That and the fact that Hamilton sucks balls.
 
With Lindsay Lohan recently being busted for DUI and cocaine possession, does that affect her overall trade value?  Remember, if you purchase Lindsay today…we’ll throw in the red carpet for free.

- Right now she’s Margot Kidder’s illegitimate daughter.  Or she is that prospect that flames out royally after the huge signing bonus.  Or the pitcher with 2 Tommy John surgeries before his 21st birthday.  We won’t give up too much to get her.
 
After making the deal last week for Rachel McAdams, I found another Canadian Rachel that could work for a trade…Rachel Roberts.  She is a model/terrible actress (see the awful movie Simone for evidence)…and heaven knows we need more of those in America.  What kind of deal would you like to make for Rachel?
 

- We need a Rachel in return.  It will take Rachel Stevens.  Has she been claimed by the US?

Shooter’s response…

I would have made the deal for Rachel Stevens, mainly because I had no clue who she was.  But it looks like she belongs to England, so I can’t make that deal.
 
How about Rachel Leigh Cook?  I think she is one year younger than Rachel Roberts.
 

- Leigh Cook has fizzled out lately and after further review, I will say no.  I will keep the other Rachel for now but keep the deals coming.

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I love this guy.  I will admit this.  I first became a fan of him when he pitched his heart out back in 1993 against the Toronto Blue Jays in the World Series.  I went to Game 1 to watch the Jays tee off on him - only to watch him stone them on television in Game 5.  The other thing he was famous for was putting a towel over his head whenever Mitch Williams came in to close the game.  Obviously, he knew what he was doing.  Just like his interview with Bob Costas.

As a competitor he should gain the respect of every baseball purist.  In his prime he was one guy you would want to take the game ball if your life depended on it.  Because of people’s short-sided view on this man, people will not admit that his heroics and greatness in October and his great career has propelled him to Hall of Fame status.  He has done enough to make the Hall of Fame - alongside his bloody sock.

Oh by the way, he said he’d allow his sock to be examined to see if the blood is his.  He stands by it because he is a man of integrity - something that is missing in several athletes today.

What has everyone’s underwear feeling less than snug are his comments made on Costas’s show.  Though we may not know this for sure, Schilling did not tell Costas to stay away from certain questions as Bonds has.  Schilling was asked a question and he answered it.  Whether or not you like the answers given Schilling was right.

As a member of the media, and a blogger, if I were to write a book on someone famous and made false claims I would be slapped with a lawsuit.  Some of you think athletes wouldn’t go after the person and you could not be more wrong.  These athletes don’t just worry about defamation of their character, but it goes much deeper than that; his kids get bombarded with insults from other kids saying their father is a cheater and a liar, his wife is embarrassed because her husband had been unfaithful and she didn’t know about it for years and the picture that has been painted is even worse than anyone could imagine for one athlete.  This book, if false, could severly destroy a family.  The only way to rectify the situation is to prove this book is a total lie.

And yet here I am looking around and people are telling Schilling to "shut his mouth".  Again, he was asked a question and he answered it.  I cannot be more clear than that.  The best line may have been left for Mark McGwire as he was absolutely dead-on with his answer.  Otherwise, McGwire would be in the Hall of Fame if people did not feel the same way as Schilling. 

We cannot imagine suing someone because we aren’t in the same position as Barry Bonds, or even Gary Sheffield for that matter.  We do not have an 8-figure bank account (most of us don’t).  But if we did, and we were dragged through the mud by the media on claims that were 100% inaccurate we would set an example and go right after these people so they wouldn’t write another piece of trash ever again.  We would set the precedence and never allow anyone to write another article, let alone book, that has no evidence of prior drug use. 

Face the facts - Curt Schilling was right.  He tells it how it is, and that’s why I love Curt Schilling. 

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Just listening to Demonicume’s show on Blog Talk Radio before the connection completely went out on me.  Lisa checked in and they were discussing College Football.  Not sure what Kendrick! was talking about - I think Demon was doing a good job.  One of the things he touched up on was gambling which was the most compelling part of the College Football discussion.  It was compelling because Demon had a first-hand account for what would go on from dorm to dorm with athletes and non-athletes alike.  That part had truth and reality - something we tend to miss out on.

Frank will check in in just a couple of hours and LGB was back on Monday.  Then there’s me, who has tomorrow’s show devoted to the bloggers all morning from 9AM-Noon.  Our blog segment, What’s The Deeley-O, is on at 11:05AM EST so if you have anything you want to submit via e-mail do so at chevradionoise@gmail.com.  You can catch the show at www.chevradioam.com.  The replay is from 5-8PM 

I wasn’t going to leave this entry without some sports…

- Gary Player has taken some flack for what he said about certain players in golf taking steroids.  You would think that when something is said to you in confidence that it would stay in confidence, right?  Well, I was taught a long time ago that if you want to keep a secret safe you keep your mouth shut.  Whoever told Player this in confidence maybe should have said nothing.  

On the other hand, Golfers who do not cheat will have no problem taking drug tests and passing them.  If that is what it takes to secure the integrity of the game of golf (which is built on integrity by it’s lady/gentlemanly-like manner players are taught to be on the course - keyword: "taught"), then there should be no problem taking and passing the test.  Player has been around the game for over 50 years and has been a great ambassador to the sport.  I cannot see him attempting to hurt the game by pushing for drug testing.  

- Patrick Arnold jumps back into the news, just when Barry Bonds was missing from the negative and/or positive headline section.  He is saying Bonds had "The Clear", Arnold’s innovative drug, in his rotation.  Victor Conte denies it.  Who has less credibility, Arnold or Conte?  Though Conte was the guy around Bonds and not Arnold, we know Conte may have been doing the most story-spinning out of anyone.  We don’t know who to believe but edge goes to the drug inventor over the distributor on this one.  Why?  Because the inventor knew what cycle would work best for the distributor’s clients.

- Would anyone like to read a great soccer mom story?  Well here it is: http://www.thestar.com/News/GTA/article/239062

…That is enough reading for the night.  Have a great night and I sincerely hope to hear from you tomorrow.  Sleep well.

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The events that occurred at the British Open yesterday gives us even more respect for Tiger Woods.  Yes he did not win the British Open but what you saw yesterday was something he would not have done that both men did yesterday.  We aren’t talking about club selection or what shot to play, but talking about being able to finish.  He goes for the throat and that is why we respect his game a lot.  

Yesterday we watched Sergio Garcia lose a tournament that was all but wrapped up for him.  He was finally going to take the monkey off his back, so to speak.  But Padraig Harrington, down 6 shots to start on Sunday, comes back to take the lead heading into the 18th green where he finally realized for a second that he was Padraig Harrington.  He didn’t stuff the golf ball in the drink once, but TWICE!  AFTER THE DROP NO LESS!!!  How?  Is that even possible?  

I see golfers on the course but do we have any competitors left in the field?  

Yes it created TV drama for anyone who cared to watch golf yesterday, but it exploited what they and several other golfers would have done if they were put in the same situation or one similar to it.  But we know that we cannot put Tiger Woods in that same boat because when he has a tournament within his grasp, meaning he’s in the lead, he finishes.  That is what the great ones do, and we saw two guys who aren’t great.  Harrington after the tournament admitted that he didn’t feel he had a chance at winning.  Do guys just show up to these tournaments just to have fun, party and potentially grab a paycheck?  Don’t answer that.  I know golfers play for the money more than winning.  That is unfortunate but that is the reality.

- It has to suck if you are Arthur Blank right now.  The owner of the Atlanta Falcons had a decision to make with Michael Vick and despite his bad feeling about Mr. Mexico, he stuck with his "Top-Dog" money-player and decided to choose him over Matt Shaub and to a lesser extent, Jim Mora Jr.   Blank takes a lot of pride in a player having integrity and is all about being a class-act and with everything that has unfolded since the Shaub trade he probably feels that if he went the other way with the decision he would be looking very good right now.  But when you give a player a big contract you tend to lean in the direction of keeping him.  You want to see your investment blossom before quitting on it.

- Who wants this win, Team A, Team B or Tim Donaghy?  Good question, harder answer.  Two of the three is right and only Donaghy would know the proper answer.   This whole situation has been such a nightmare for David Stern and the NBA that you may as well hear this during post-game sideline interviews:

CHERYL MILLER: Kobe your Milwaukee Bucks came through in the end, tell us what went down during the last two minutes of the game.

BRYANT: Well the official came up to me and said he had a dime down on us for this game so he said if I cut to the basket and charged into KG that he’d call a foul on Garnett so that he’d foul out.  We know he’s a crucial part of the Memphis Grizzlies.  It’s always comforting to know the ref has your back when he’s betting on our games.

MILLER: Don’t you think it takes the integrity away from the game Kobe?

BRYANT: Yeah but a win is a win for us.  Watch out for the Milwaukee Bucks BABY!!!!! (crowd cheers).

This was the best news Mike Vick heard all week because this took some of the attention away from him.  With the exception of P.E.T.A.

- If the New York Yankees are going to make their run, it happens now.  Not because this is the best time to do it but because they have the weaker part of their schedule happening right now.  Kansas City could not come at a better time for them, along with Baltimore and the White Sox who have played in a cloud at times this year.  If they dont rip through their schedule over the next few weeks then they are done.  But don’t be surprised if they really begin to turn it up.  At the same time, try not to get too impressed with them because they would have just beaten up all the bums and that does not prove anything to anyone.

- Last year I said that if I started a franchise today and I could have any baseball player in the major leagues it would be Albert Pujols.  Why not?  He’s still young (27) and he will continue to mash the ball for a long time, and hopefully for a longer period than some of the other established superstars.  The guy who may be second on that list is Albert Pujols Jr, otherwise known as Miguel Cabrera.  He’s only 24 and the kid is a mashing machine.  Hopefully he does not go Bobby Bonilla and eat his way out of the major leagues.  Some say he has an attitude problem but he’s not the first stud to have one of those.

Either way, those two guys would help my franchise win.  Eventually.

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The ideal time period to post a blog entry would be after a big sporting event, nationally or locally, or if there was breaking news on a story. Well tonight I’m playing this different as “The Noise Factor” will be brought to you at an obscene time (it’s 2:15 AM EST) and I just finished at a party. No I am not drunk. I realize Lindsay Lohan has probably given the same line but I haven’t put my vehicle into a pole and I would easily pass the sobriety test. However, I am exhausted so let’s get the ball rolling.

- Did everyone in unison say the words “Oh shit!” when the headline came on regarding an NBA referee gambling on games he himself officiated? I certainly did, and I even kept sexism in mind as I said, “Him or her just tossed a grenade towards David Stern with the clip missing.” Since the name was not released initially we could not assume the referee was male since the NBA has opened the doors to female referees. But we know it’s a male and we know who this is (Tim Donaghy). What we don’t know is the whole truth or how this will effect the NBA from here on in.

People have been very suspicious about the NBA officiating for quite a while and there was no evidence to suggest that an official would be making a call against a team for their own benefit. Anytime shady gamblers and mob ties connect any sport we see that the person in deep is playing a dangerous game, and what this does is dents the credibility of every other NBA referee in the game. We will see a game we feel has been poorly officiated and we will wonder. This will be David Stern’s biggest test to date as NBA commissioner.

- Yes I will be the 1000th person to discuss Mike Vick but I’ll get this out of the way so someone can become person 1001. Just to clarify for people who don’t believe dog fighting is a problem you could not be futher from the truth. The last thing society needs is a hungry dog trained to attack to be let loose in public to potentially go after a human being - like a young boy or girl and be a predator to that innocent child. How many stories have we heard over the years about a boy or girl dying because a dog attacked and killed them? There have been several, and a dog that has been taking on all comers and has lived through it will have been taught to kill thanks to those who trained him.

As for those who are wondering why NFL commissioner hasn’t suspended Vick just know that Goodell does not want to be in court over this which is what could happen if he decides to suspend him now. He needs to wait this out longer before making a decision - if he even has a decision to make. That obviously depends on how this all plays out. Just a warning: If no witness can testify to Vick’s participation or appearance at these fights DURING THE TRAIL, his chances of skating on this will be high. So if you think Mike Vick is guilty you better hope someone shows up to testify that he was a willing participant in these Doggy gladiator matches.

- Question for baseball fans: How do you get timely hitting when you score 1 run and get 4 hits in a game? The answer is if you win 1-0, apparently. I cannot understand that kind of bold/ridiculous statement because the Toronto Blue Jays have no timely hitting. If they did, they would have beaten the Yankees 3 out of 4 this past week rather than just once. But don’t insult my intelligence by telling me about timely hitting when you only drop 1 run against one of the worst pitchers in the game, Jeff Weaver. Funny, Josh Towers is also horrendous yet they were magnificant today.

- Sergio Garcia can’t blow this opportunity, can he? Please don’t answer that because I am envisioning greatness and a complete meltdown simultaneously. Golf is a funny game where we have seen thousands of golfers blow leads to lose a tournament they should have won. So when you think of Sergio, which do you see? Success or failure once again?

- At this time a night you can’t be sure what you will see. But I just saw a woman go from being a masseuse to having lesbian action with another woman who just entered the room. I guess the guy who was getting a rubdown will get a happy ending in a visual sense. Nevermind, the women just walked over to the table. No wonder he needs his back worked on. Typical softcore porn. Uh oh, he’s done. Lightweight.

This is starting to get out of hand (no pun intended). Have a great night and even better morning.

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I apologize right off the bat as this show was not podcasted thanks to yours truly.  Shows that Eric is our MVP.  But you can catch the replay of the show at www.chevradioam.com at 5PM where the Deeley-O blog segment will be on right around 7PM tonight.  Hope you can catch it. 

Thanks goes to two blogger heavyweights who participated this week.  Yes Lisa, I got you in.  Thank you…

Lisa4USC

What is boxing day?

- A day used for an excuse to shop for reduced price items the day after Christmas

Will Canada ever have an Independance Day?

- Probably not.  But another day off doesn’t hurt anybody.

Do your waterbeds convert to ice skating rinks in the Winter?

- No, they convert to goalie training for their side-to-side movement.  And some Figure Skating spins.

Does Canada have any talent other than comedians?

- We have great hockey players - does that count as talent?

Do Canadian prostitutes give change back?

- No, they are just as selfish and needy as the American prostitutes.

Is Miss Canada really a reject from the Minnesota Vikings cheer squad?

- They are also rejects from: Detroit Lions, Buffalo Bills, Seattle Seahawks, Green Bay Packers, New York Rangers and all CFL teams.

ShooterB

When is your hoser’s guide to “Honeyball” going to be published?

- I think a semi-sports blog entry is in order for me, isn’t it?  I promise I’ll toss it onto your computer screen soon.
 
It’s been awhile since we attempted a trade, and I’ve finally identified a Canadian target – Rachel McAdams.  Here is my trade offer:
 
CANADA GETS – Michelle Wie, A-Rod’s wife Cynthia Rodriguez
 
    
USA GETS – Rachel McAdams, a jar of peanut butter, and some lubricant
 
    
 
Do we have a Deeley-O?
 

- I didn’t answer the question and waited until I posted this before giving my answer.  I love Rachel McAdams, just like I love Natasha Henstridge.  But business is business, and if I have a shot at helping Canadian athletes and women who make mistakes by marrying Metrosexuals then I will step in and do it.  WE HAVE A DEAL!  Canada’s golf game just improved and Wie is only 17-18 compared to McAdam being 30.  Mrs. A-Rod doesn’t look too bad in that pic and what the hell will I do with Peanut Butter anyway?  Take the jar!
 

For my trade proposal, I’m assuming that hosers have access lubricant.   Is this true, or do Canucks prefer to get it done "Canada Dry"?
 
- I wouldn’t know, I’ve never had any of my women have that problem (ego - check).  But we have warm lubricants for cold spots in the winter so yes, we have access.

For A-Rod’s next trip to Toronto, he needed some information about prostitute prices.  Can you tell us the cost of the following?
        
     Canadian Mist - 80 bucks but that has to be done with a dude only
-         The Alberta Squirta - 100 and that too is only with a dude
-         The Ottawa Squat-a-wa - 175 with a lady (it use to be 150 last year), 150 with a man
-         The Winnipeg Spread-Leg - 200 with a lady, 175 with a man (ALL TAX INCLUDED)
oo
ok- That’s all for this week.  Thanks for participating and again you can check the replay at 5PM EST at: www.chevradioam.com.  Thanks to Frank for plugging my show on the All Star bloggers show last night.  Have a great day everyone!

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Every once in a while Blog Nation will go back and pat other bloggers on the back for a job well done.  And they truly deserve it, believe me.  This tends to happen when people decide to either write very positively or negatively towards certain bloggers or the blog site in general.  Truth is, very few people here will go on to become writers as we use this as a hobby.  All the power to you if you make a career out of this but odds are you will be a lifetime blogger and that is it.

Before I start talking about random sports (where again I’ll make you remember to never forget The Dan’s name), Sam Moffie came on my program today to discuss his new book "SWAP".  It’s a novel based loosely on the story of the two New York Yankee players who swapped wives back in 1972-73.  Sam has delivered a copy of the book my way so I hope to have it very soon and he was telling me that this book has a very good shot at becoming a Hollywood movie.  Here is a link to Sam’s website, and a link to the live interview.

Now let’s rock the house…

- Michael Vick has jumped on top of the "leaderboard" with his indictment today.  Obviously with what has already been reported a lot of you will believe he is guilty as is.  You are entitled to your opinion and I won’t talk you out of it.  However, was his image really pretty prior to this fiasco?  Apparently it was, but lets remember a few things here: he is the same guy who used the alias "Ron Mexico" so people wouldn’t realize the connection he has with an STD.  he is also the same guy who has flipped off fans who happen to be fans of his team.  There are other little things you can add to this as well (the small donation to V-Tech school, possibly being a ‘coach killer’, his whack brother etc.).  So his image wasn’t exactly air-tight prior to this - even if his billboards sported a big Nike swoosh.

- Gary Sheffield’s latest racism-related statements have been talked about over the last couple of days which means this is a story that has "legs".  People have attempted to break this whole thing down and when it comes to race issues you just don’t know where the finish line is.  So I came up with my own analogy to make sense of this entire thing.  Whether or not you agree or disagree is your choice but here’s how I see it:

Sheff was raised in a tough neighborhood where color barriers had finally been brought down after years of struggle.  Obviously change takes a long time as people were use to see things such as "no colors allowed" in a public washroom or public restaurant.  Lifted were the rules that forced black people sit on the back of the bus.  But since Sheffield was born in 1968 there was probably more work to do during his early years of life.  I doubt everyone complied to the new changes in society and racism was very much prevalent when he was growing up.  So if Gary acted out at school or perhaps bullied another kid who happened to be white a teacher would be all over him for it and the life lesson he got out of it going home could have been (keyword: could) "They pick on you because you are black".  Whoever fed him this info could have been right, or flat-out wrong.  Regardless, when you are very young and are being taught that a certain way is the right way of thinking then you will go on for years believing that this is the way things are, no matter how wrong you could be.  You and I go to bed with thoughts of things that we have been led to believe is right when we, too, could be wrong.  So when Gary Sheffield had a attitude problem in Milwaukee or San Diego or didn’t hustle and coaches were all over him, he could have made the assumption that it was due to the color of his skin and nothing else.  Did any of that make any sense to you?  I hope it did.

- I promised myself I would post the numbers of these 4 great hitters of this decade: Albert Pujols, Vladimir Guerrero, Alex Rodriguez and Barry Bonds.  Obviously there are several other great hitters (ManRam), but I posted these 4 MVP’s just to see how they compare.  I included the 2007 stats so the average statistics will go up once this year is completed:

Pujols: .330 AVG    38 HR    116 RBI
Guerrero: .328 AVG   33HR   106 RBI

A-Rod: .305 AVG   44 HR   121 RBI
Bonds: .327 AVG   38 HR   84 RBI

Things we know…

- Only Bonds and Guerrero have missed significant playing time due to injury, Bonds especially.

- Guerrero and Bonds have probably less talent around them, thus less RBI chances and Bonds gets walked a lot.

- Only Pujols and Guerrero have great doubles totals.

- Despite being known as a guy who can’t hit in the clutch, Rodriguez has enough talent to get his opportunities and drives in a ton of runs.

- Barry has a massive head.

All great hitters.  You can decide which one you like the best.

- A lot of people have linked Chris Benoit’s death to his use of steroids and perhaps having a "roid rage", but I have one question for you: how many athletes in our sports have killed their families because of roid rage?  Then again, with the way sports is today if there was ever a murder (family or not), entourages will be there to clean up any mess or take the fall.  That’s why they are there, right?  If you don’t have competent people in your entourage then you will get into trouble (See: Jones, Pacman).

- College Football could potentially have a final four by 2011 with the top 4 ranked teams playing for the National Championship in an actual tournament-style.  While that would be better than the current format, we still run into the same problems only this time we’ll have the 5th ranked team griping about their position and that they are better than at least one team involved in the tourney, and people will agree.  The other problem is, it won’t happen until 2011.  This format would be preferable, say, NOW!

- With the success of the Utah Jazz this year, don’t you think that any shooting guard would love to have the opportunity to play alongside Deron Williams and play for a team that is a contender for the West title?  I’m not sure why guys who can play the two-guard position isn’t volunteering to play for the Jazz because they have a chance to start AND win.  With Derek Fisher now out of the picture this gives them a shot at that position, plus they could out-perform Fisher and make that team better.

- I don’t know what to say right now about the NHL because there seems to be this inevitability that they will run into problems financially and they will have to rollback payroll.  The only thing I can really say is I cannot wait for the Toronto Maple Leafs rude-awakening when they find out they still suck.  Then again, I can wait because the Leafs are not a team that deserves to be covered as extensively as they do so we’ll be bombarded with hockey crap rather than sports that really matter like the NBA or NFL.  Sorry, had to tell it how it is.

- Tiger vs. The Field?  I go with the house, despite how great Tiger is and has been at the British Open.  I never thought his game was suited for the British after his first title there and then he turned around busted off a few more majors.  However, I like the odds of taking a million other players over just one guy, no matter how money he is.  Doubt last week helped Phil Mickelson much.  That meltdown won’t help the psyche.  Then again, we’ve seen a lot of crazy things happen in the world of golf, even at Carnoustie (Van de Velde, anyone?).  Speaking of which, he may have melted down back in 1999 but Van de Velde’s putt to get into the playoff was actually clutch.  But the damage was done.

…What’s The Deeley-O is back on for this Thursday.  Direct all e-mails to the e-mail address provided in the box to the right of this blog entry.  It doesn’t matter what you all write to me, just know that Thursdays are devoted to YOU, the fine bloggers of this site.  By the way, check out Frank’s All Star Blogger show tomorrow night and if you don’t know what it is just ask someone.  They will direct you to the right people. 

Did you see all of this coming?

www.chevradioam.com 

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Some of the heavyweights came out to play this week and I hope the podcast is finally up.  We have been working diligently to get it up and running.  Regardless, here is the hard copy of today’s Deeley-O:

Lisa4USC

- What does Hoser mean? Is it a derog term for a girl whose throat has
more suction than a Hoover and more force than a garden hose? Does it
mean someone screwing someone else over, as in, " he hosed me"? Or
maybe the Canadian meaning of the female name, Paris? Finally, in the
French speaking provinces of Canada, is it prounounced Hose-eh? Is that
how the Mexicans got the name Jose? And how the term "eh’ got
introduced to the Canadian vocabulary? Inquiring minds want to know.

…The thing is I never use the term.  Perhaps I’ve been Americanized.  The real good part came when she asked if Eric is a cute as he sounds.  My answer is: I suppose. 

Miracle

- I Had a doctor’s visit this morning, and as a
tradition if you’re late you have to bring in doughnuts.

Do you have a similar tradition in Canada? If so I’ll
bet you don’t bring doughnuts, because we Americans
believe that the jelly doughnut is such a staple of
the Canadian diet that it wouldn’t be that special
for some hoser that’s an hour late to show up with
box of powdered jellies.

So what does any self respecting Canadian bring in as
a treat for his work mates?
Canadian Bacon
Poutine
Pam Anderson Sex Tape
Moose Chips
Molson

…Coffee, then donuts - in that order.  Canadian beer is next in line.

Smoketheblowfish

- What is the Canadian to English translation for "Everybody Wang Chung Tonight"?

  Does
"Shrinkage of the Tallywacker" go away once a Cannuck travels south of
the border? or is this a permanent condition?…..Lisa4usc and
Bluegrasslady (BILFs) want to know   You read
and commented on my "Apology Post".  As a fine representative of all
that is America, I would like to add a few apologies to my
list…..We’re sorry about putting the cities of Cleveland, Detroit,
Buffalo, Green Bay, and Tijuana, Mexico so close to Canada. We are
sorry for thinking Lover Boy is a gay bar in Markham. We are sorry for
believing that the Calgary Stampeders is really Kama Sutra Position
#48.  We are sorry for letting Celine Dion complete the surgery (going
from a man to woman)……….What are you guys sorry for (outside of
letting your women think furry armpits are sexay)?  

I eagerly await your responses!

…And I eagerly answer them to the best of my ability Smoke!  Eric gave the answer to the first question because you had me stumped.  Literally I did not think the 80’s pop duo would ever cross my mind like that.  They were big WHEN I WAS 5!!

Remember snowpants?  Or how about Long-Johns?  Well that’s what keeps our pecker from looking like lifesaver candy. 

And we’re sorry for a lot of things but I’m not working on much sleep so check the podcast for our answers, hahaha.  www.chevradioam.com.

ShooterB

- 1)  In your latest blog, you snubbed A-Rod as a Hall of Famer…while giving the nod to Albert Pujols and Vladimir Guerrero.  I guess I underestimated the quality of weed in Canada…that must be some good stuff.  Anyway, I have nothing against either of those two guys…but come on!  That’s like replacing a nude pictorial of Pamela Anderson with a Margaret Thatcher beaver shot.  So what is your real excuse for snubbing A-Rod?  I’ll make it multiple choice so you don’t freak out looking for an answer:

  A)     The mystery stripper A-Rod was pictured with in Toronto is actually your girlfriend. B)     A-Rod’s
stunning good looks makes you question your sexuality C)     You want an extra spot for the Hall of Fame just in case Josh Towers has a shot at making the ballot

D)     You’ve watched too much hoser hockey and went brain
dead

- SLOW DOWN!!!!  WHOA!!!!  I did not snub A-Rod from the Hall of Fame.  I just think that this decade (2000-2007), Albert and Vlad have been the best hitters during this time frame with A-Rod and Bonds right there with them.  That’s scary - I’ll go with answer E. 

2)  I recently found out that Vladimir Guerrero has fathered 4 children with 4 different women.  And we all know about Tom Brady trying to do the same.  Are you going to take my advice, and teach these athletes how to go anal before they create an army of clones?  Maybe you could tell Eric Rosenhoser to give a seminar.

- Tell the women to keep their legs closed if they feel a little bloated and all athletes need to carry a purse that contains 2 unexpired boxes of Trojan Larges. 

  3)  What is this crap on your blog about an All-Star skills competition for
hockey?  Skill in hockey?  You must be joking.  But please enlighten me, which of the following contests do they have? A)    Seeing who is better at stick-handling? B)     Couples ice skating with pink ballerina outfits? C)    Seeing who can fit the most pucks in their mouth? D)    Opening wide to see who has the most teeth?

 - They actually have a relay race around the rink which is pretty lame.  The skills competition’s only good thing is the hardest shot.  Watching a net shake when a puck rings the post is incredible.

…So just click on "CHEV Podcasts" on the left side of the web page and hopefully the podcast is now up.  If it’s not, I know I will be ticked but Eric will need consoling.  He will be extremely bitter.  Tomorrow should be the best show of this week, if not, my entire life - so check it out.  Cheers. 

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